Monday, November 30, 2009

Day 38

Big Kid had a fall yesterday when he was trying to get to his chair. He landed on his knees, but they're ok. He figured he had some bad knee karma coming for laughing so hard when I fell on my face. ;-)

As a result, the staff are insisting that he hit the call button before he tries to get up, so someone will be there to watch him fall (as opposed to throwing themselves under him to keep him from cracking his noggin). I'm just kidding.

The only problem with that is that sometimes it takes them 20 minutes to respond, and if he has to go to the bathroom, it might be too late.

Littlebit, thank you so much for the kind words and advice. I'm absolutely going to find out if there are things Big Kid can do other than leg lifts and extentions in bed, and hand weights, etc.

I think I'm a little worried about the wasted time. Big Kid is apathetic by nature, and gives up easily when frustrated. Right now he is calm and motivated to get moving, in a week he may not be. If he loses his motivation, it's going to take the healing process a lot longer. Those of you who've read my blog for a long time will probably get where I'm going with this.

Bi-polar disorder is ugly that way. Meds aren't the perfect fix-it-all, and when Big Kid gets a case of the uglies, it can get really, really ugly.

Last night he called me in tears. "I just want to die," he wept. Turns out his friend, who had been staying at Kitty's house, stole a bunch of his video games and took off. This is not the first time a "friend" has stolen from him, mostly because Big Kid isn't a real good judge of character and chooses dirtbags to hang out with. But the betrayal stung because he tries to have faith in the innate goodness of people.

After I got him calmed down, I called Kitty to find out what in the world possessed her to tell him something like that right now, when she knows how fragile he is emotionally and physically. "Well, he had to find out sometime", was all she said. Yeah, but now? Right now? It happened a couple of weeks ago, not last night. She couldn't wait a couple more weeks to tell him? She hung up on me.

I never raised my voice. I wasn't nasty either. So lovely. Today we get to sort out a 47-year-old-going-on-16-year-old's passive aggressive BS. I've got half a mind to break my bunny-slippered foot up her butt.

Called the night nurse and explained the situation. Asked her if she'd check on him a little more often and try to assess his emotional condition and to call if she thought we should drive down into the city to spend the night with him.

Today, hopefully Big Kid will get the stomach tube out and the pic line. Positive steps! We want him home for Christmas!



Beth said...

You either caught up on some sleep or you’re running on adrenalin reserves – when you mention your bunny slippers – watch out!
Keeping Big Kid’s frustration to a minimum will be a challenge – but I think his desire to get well & get home will help keep his motivation high.

Jeanie said...

I'm betting on you in the "Miss Kitty" games. What was she thinking. Looks like full recovery is getting closer. Best wishes for lots of progress this week.

Valerie Marie said...

Dear ATM,
please try to get some sleep. I'm worry about you. I think BK wants as much as you to come home: that will be the best motivation. Best wishes for all of us! ((hugs & kisses))

Boozy Tooth said...

My son was also diagnosed with bi-polar disorder and suffers the same issues with trust and judgment. He is on the mild side and not medicated so he floats along pretty well most of the time. But the other times? Oy. He is interested in seeing a doc and trying a light regime of meds to see if it helps. At 22 he's the best judge of whether or not he feels the need.

As for Big Kid, this emotional wave will subside. He's dealing with a lot of things right now and the video game thing was just an easy outlet. Shame on Kitty for allowing the theft to occur in the first place and for laying that on him now. She's a trip. I don't envy you that situation at all and think a good swift bunny slippered boot up the behind might do her some good.

litzi said...

When you stated we want him home for Christmas did you mean Attila’s home or back to Kitty Cougar’s lair? Her heart may be in the right place but it doesn’t sound as though she’d be the most stalwart person for Big Kid to be around right now.

It’s amazing that Ms. Kitty hasn’t had a sampling of your bunny slippers before now…have you been practicing your punting?


Michelle Flaherty said...

I don't know Kitty but I don't like her. I don't think she's a good influence on him at all and can understand your dilemma about wanting to kick her in the pants and telling your son to get rid of her.

I know you didn't ask for my two cents, but I gave them anyway.

Anonymous said...

That totally bites. I will now pray for God's timing in his recovery and his bi-polarity (did I spell that right?) and for some common sense to land on Kitty's head (or up her butt via your bunny slippers).

Ashley's Mom said...

Home (yours) for Christmas would be freakin' awesome!! I'm keeping my fingers crossed!

St Jude said...

I understand how the bi polar affects not just big kid but everyone around him. My daughter is bi polar too and I know the ugly times too hun. I also know how they can have a tendency to 'choose' inappropriate friends. My daughter suffered the same consequences on a number of occasions too. All we can do is be there for them and hope to God that wherever and whenever we can we protect them from themselves the best we can.

Kim Ayres said...

continued ((hugs)) :)

Cloudy said...

It is a hard road for all of you. He is making all this progress and all these wonderful small steps, but it is still so much to deal with. I wish for everything to go back to normal for you and your family very soon.

The Quacks of Life said...

and we hope he's home for xmas as well.

yorksnbeans said...

Here Kitty, Kitty...want to see a bunny??? ;-)

Hope he's home for Christmas, too!

Chris H said...

That is all.

gayle said...

Don't know her but Kitty sounds like a little brat!

Littlebit said...


You're very welcome. One thing...I know (well, very much assume) that Big Kid's Bipolar Disorder is on his medical records - that doesn't mean the OT/PT are aware of all of the disease's implications. Depending on what they say, their knowing that he's at risk for losing motivation when looking at the not-so-longer term might be very important. And they should certainly know how to document that particular "special case" in order to justify any change in treatment planning/goals/.

Webster said...

What is it with Kitty that she is dating a 16 year old? She's 47? Isn't that criminal? Does she have mental health issues? She sounds manipulative and dangerous to me.

Attila, take care of yourself. I believe that BK will be home for Christmas.