Asshat of the Week---Nancy Pelosi

This week's Asshat goes to Speaker of the House, Nancy Pelosi.

I'm not writing this as a political statement, because I'd be awarding it to anyone who was this arrogant in the blatant spending of my money.

Last year, Judicial Watch uncovered Ms. Pelosi's use of our Air Force as her own personal air taxi service for herself, her staff, her family and guests---sticking us with her bill of over 2 million dollars. This week, Judicial watch has obtained the documents under the FOIA from the Air Force detailing these expenditures and published them online.

Now I can understand the use of the Air Force on international flights where safety is an issue. As long as family members and non-essential to the mission guests pay their own market-value fare.

But on domestic flights? Bullpucky. Over 28k per flight to travel back and forth to her district? 31 trips that included her family?

Our domestic airline industry is facing troubles much like many businesses in these times. With the hundreds of flights that criss-cross our country daily, I don't see why Ms. Speaker can't book a flight on one of our own commercial airlines since they're going that way anyway.

Even if she rode first class, with say---a couple of her security personnel (does she get Secret Service protection?) and an assistant, with her staff riding coach like the rest of the great unwashed, it couldn't cost what amounts to a year's salary for many per flight. Her family can ride coach or first class, whatever they choose, because hey---it should be on their dime, not ours.

In addition, Amtrak and Greyhound need the business too. Don't think it would cost 28k to book an entire train car or charter a bus for her entourage either.

And over 100K for food and booze? WTF is up with that? If she's going to glom up military flights, let them eat MREs (Meals Ready to Eat) and bring their own bottles. My ex says those beef stew MREs are pretty tasty. He thinks there is a warehouse somewhere with a gazillion leftovers from the last war. Those things are like spam---they last forever. If they're good enough for our servicepeople, well...in my opinion, Ms. Pelosi and her staff are employed in OUR service. Pack your own lunch or take what we got.

Our country is in an economic crisis, Ms. Pelosi, and I'm not pointing fingers on who helped get us there (koff::bailouts::koff). Everyone has to pull in their belts a little, and as the Speaker of the House, you should be leading by example and not living the life of a rock star on our nickel.

As an end note, speaking of leading by example, I want to give some props to the First Lady.

In the last year I've seen media critics chide Mrs. Obama for not wearing couture all the time and for daring to wear the same outfit twice in public. I congratulate her for being what many of us aspire to be----fit, healthy and great-looking but unpretentious in her dress. She wears realistic clothes for every occasion, just like the rest of us. As a working mom, I want a First Lady I can relate to, and she fits the bill for me. Kudos, Mrs. O!

Thanks to The Right Side News, where I first caught sight of this article.

Recovering

Since Big Kid's crisis, we've been getting lot of rehabilitative experience up close and personal.

Shannon Wills, a physical therapist, offered to do a guest post for others facing recovery.

Rehabilitation After a Traumatic Illness – What You Need to Know

There are no guarantees in life, especially when it comes to your health. Most of us take good health for granted, and it is only when we lose it that we realize its value. Any serious illness or injury is traumatic for both the person who is affected and their families. And when they find that they’ve crossed the point of danger, they start to concentrate on the recovery period, which is again a harrowing and difficult time if they don’t know how to go about it the right way. Rehabilitation is a very important part of any recovery process, and if you or a loved one is going through this period, here’s what you need to know:

• You must be patient, yet persistent: There was a time two years ago when I had to undergo major knee surgery. The pain was unbearable, and worst of all, the only way I could walk was with the help of crutches. I despaired of ever getting back to my normal degree of activity and hated the enforced sedentary lifestyle. The only thing that kept me going was my physical therapy schedule and my doctor’s promise that I would be back to normal in six weeks if I followed the rehab program correctly. And so I learned to be patient and do only what I was allowed to do. Overworking my muscles and joints meant a setback, and more days using the crutches. The key to a full recovery is patience combined with persistence. You know the goal is in sight, but you mustn’t hurtle towards it with no control or you risk suffering a relapse. So be patient, and wait for a full recovery.

• Follow your doctor’s orders: If you are on a course of medication, don’t hesitate to take them regularly and on time. Do not add to or subtract from these medicines without consulting your doctor. And if you have to follow a physical therapy program, do your exercises diligently and without fail. The PT routine is what gets your body back to normal by ensuring that your muscles, joints and other parts of your body regain their lost functions and function as well as they did before your injury. It also helps you regain lost skills that help you take care of yourself and do all that you need to do to get through a regular day in your life.

• Don’t hesitate to seek help: You will definitely be too infirm and frail to take care of yourself during the rehabilitation period. So don’t hesitate to seek the help of family and friends, or if that is not possible, hire someone to help you out. There are various healthcare facilities that allow you to recuperate in their care and provide you with a topnotch team to monitor your progress and help you on your way to recovery.

• Know that every recovery program is different: Don’t worry if other people with the same illness or injury are recovering faster than you because every person is unique and has different physiological features. Your body will recover at the speed that is right for it, so concentrate on getting better without focusing on what other people are doing.

This article is written by Shannon Wills, who writes on the topic of Physical Therapist Assistant Schools . She welcomes your comments at her email id : shannonwills23@gmail.com .

Patrick's Dad, You're My Hero

I want to be you when I grow up.

This and That

Gah! When is this train going to stop? I'm ready to get off!

Big Kid continues to improve little by little. He was doing so well that the doc suggested that we go down to 14 hours a day on oxygen. Unfortunately, about 2 hours into it, his saturation level dropped down to 68. So he's back on 24 hours a day.

We got him and all his accoutrements moved down to Kitty's the day before yesterday. It was time. He was ready to go, and we were ready for him to go too. ;-) Dealing with his psychiatric issues on top of every thing else just wore me out.

We were hoping he'd be able to take a semester off from school to continue his recovery. No luck there. If he's not attending, he'll lose his health insurance. He's still having problems with his short term memory and fine motor skills. We went down and consulted with his professors, explained the situation, and thankfully they are being very accommodating. He's just going to do the best he can, and they'll give him a little extra time for reading, etc.

Two weeks ago, Hubby was away for a week to take some classes out of town. Two days into it, he woke up to excruciating pain in his legs.

For a long time, he's had lesions on his lower legs. At one point, he thought it was a recurrence of childhood excema (sp), and didn't do anything about it. A few years ago he went to a specialist and found out it was a circulatory/autoimmune problem. When it flares up, he has to take shots, and that usually calms it down. He hasn't had a flare-up in a couple of years. Stress is the main trigger, so I guess he was due.

Anyhoo, two days into this class he had a major flare up. Both legs swelled and the lesions were huge and inflamed. Of course, being him, he stayed the rest of the week for the class. By the time he got home, there were blood blisters on top of some of them.

His doc was worried that he might have some kind of staph infection (of the flesh-eating kind) and immediately started him on some heavy-duty antibiotics and goof ball pills. And they took a biopsy. Three days later, Hubby got a fever and was nauseous all the time. The day before yesterday, he broke out in a rash all over his body.

The good news is that he doesn't have flesh-eating bacteria. The bad news is that he has an allergy to whatever antibiotic they were giving him and that was making him so ill. He started prednisone last night, and hopefully he'll be feeling better.

Because as soon as he does, I'm running away from home. I mean it.

LOL

Hope you guys are happy and healthy and will check in with you soon.

xo

ATM

Happy Birthday

To The Happening Dude on your 18th birthday.

There are not enough words to express how grateful we are that you wanted to come live with us. There are not enough words to express how proud you make us and how much joy you've brought to our family since you've become a part of it.

Through most of your life, the adults who have been in charge of loving, cherishing and nourishing your unique and caring spirit have let you down, but you've flourished in spite of it. You have so many special gifts and so much potential.

Please know that we couldn't love you more if you had been born to us.

You're OUR guy.

Happy 18th, you precious boy.

xoxox

Happy New Year

Sorry I dropped off the grid, but the events of the past couple of months finally caught up with me. I caught a cold and threw my back out right before Christmas. Since I think I was physically and emotionally exhausted on top of it, I just collapsed for a few days. Luckily I had minions (or would that be elves?) to pick up the slack, so the holiday went smoothly, if a bit painfully.

Big Kid is doing really well. He has one more in-home physical therapy appointment, and then he'll be going to out-patient therapy. We've been able to wean him down a liter on oxygen. Woohoo! He's frustrated by the slow progress of his recovery. His physical therapist told him that for every day he spent in the ICU, it will take a week of recovery to get back to where he was. If that's true, I have to keep pointing out to him that he's way ahead of the game.

He's having trouble with his short-term memory. In a couple of months he's scheduled to have a complete neuro-evaluation to see what the impact is.

One really good thing that has happened is regarding his health insurance. Since he turns 23 in a couple of days, his insurance was going to run out. I've been scrambling to try to get him medicaid on disability, or signed up for the Colorado resident discount program. Turns out that there were changes in his dad's plan in the last year and they will continue coverage until he's 24. Thank heavens.

Last week we took him back to the ICU to show him where he had been and to thank the staff for saving his life. I brought them two huge bandboxes filled with individually wrapped snacks---trail mix, crackers, cookies, etc and a variety of cocoas, teas, and chai for their break room. There is no adequate way to express the gratitude we feel for having our boy back, but hopefully this will help.

Today is our wedding anniversary, so Hubby and I are planning a romantic dinner out sans children. The fact that they are all (just about) legally adults has not stopped the grumbling, especially from Little Guy who ended up coming with us last year.

Too bad, so sad. My heart bleeds for them. LOL

But I suppose with this full house, running around nekkid and scaring the dogs is out of the question.

Shucks.

Hope you all have a wonderful new year!

Day 54

Sorry I haven't had much time to post, but between Christmas stuff, Big Kid stuff and everyday stuff, there's only so many hours! Slowly but surely, I'm getting around to visiting all of you kind people who've kept up with us.

Big Kid is having his ups and downs. We haven't been able to lower his oxygen any because in 20 minutes or so, his saturation level drops to the low 80s.

He's working hard on his PT and OT exercises. Both therapists are pleased with his progress. I suggested they incorporate loading the dishwasher in the exercises, because bending up and down is good for him, right?

Yesterday we had a bit of a scare because when he woke up, he was coughing up some blood. Blood of any kind is worrying, because he's taking fairly high doses of cumadon (sp). If it was coming from his lungs, that's even more of a crisis. So we had to run around and find out where it was coming from. Apparently he had a bloody nose while he was sleeping, and instead of coming out his nostrils, it went down the other way.

Gross, but whew!

Kitty stayed the weekend and helped keep Big Kid occupied, which was a blessing. When he's bored he makes everyone miserable, even though he is trying hard not to. He gets so anxious that I can't even use the bathroom without having him knocking on the door asking me if I'm going to be long. ::sigh::

She's coming again this afternoon so hopefully I'll be able to run out and get some errands done that I haven't been getting around to. Like buying Xmas cards. ;-)

Later Gators!

xo

ATM

Day 49

Oh golly, what a week it's been. As much as I love having my boy home and recovering, I am totally wiped out.

Since we weren't expecting him to be discharged to us so soon, we were kind of caught with our pants down.

When they discharged the kid Monday night, the treating doctor from the care hospital went over his medications with me. Everything was the same until we got to the depakote. They had been giving him twice his prescribed dose.

"What should we do?" I asked the doc.

"Go ahead and give him his regular dose."

Uh no. We've been dealing with psychotropic meds for a number of years, and know that drastically cutting a med can cause a bad case of screaming meemies at best, and possibly a seizure at worst. So first thing on Tuesday morning, I called Big Kid's neuropsych and explained the situation to the receptionist. I left an urgent message asking the doc to call to give us some guidance on what to do. No return call on Tuesday. I called again first thing on Wednesday, and left another message.

The receptionist was completely unconcerned and said that the doctor hadn't received the message the day before. They had closed the clinic due to snow.

Well, SOMEBODY was there to take the initial message, I argued. Couldn't they have let the doctor know that one of his patients had an urgent situation? Did the phones automatically stop working every time it snowed? She was unimpressed.

By 4 o'clock there was still no return call and I was getting frantic. I called Hubby and asked him to give it a try. He called me back and said I'd probably hear from the doctor within an hour. I did, and the doc was none too pleased. Hubby had chewed his receptionist out after getting the same blase treatment I had received and told her the next call would be from our lawyer. Oy.

I got a long non-explanation about how since he wasn't the doctor who doubled the dose and had no idea why they doubled the dose that he couldn't help us. I finally got frustrated with him and said, "Look, you're the original prescribing physician. Who the heck else are we supposed to call? All I want to know is, is it ok to go from 2000 mg of depakote directly down to 1000mg? Can you give me a little advice here?"

No, no, not good to do that. Why don't we keep him on the 2000mg dose until he can see Big Kid after the first of the year?

Fat chance. The kid is half zombie with overmedication. He's glassy-eyed and has the shakes. I called our family doc, who is now in charge of the boy's continued recovery. We worked out a tapering down plan. whew.

I think we may be looking for a new neuropsych soon. The lack of concern over the kid's situation bothers me. It's not like I called him after hours. You'd think within 2 days he'd get 5 minutes to return an urgent call. Then again, he might not want us back either, after Hubby went all medieval on the receptionist.

Big Kid has a large blood clot in near his armpit. So he has to take cumadon (sp) for a few months. The nurse has to come and check his levels every day or so. He gets physical and occupational therapy a few times a week. He's refusing to use the walker or a cane, so we have to walk with him to make sure he doesn't fall flat on his face.

One problem we didn't forsee was the fact that we don't have a walk-in shower. The kid can't lift his legs over the tub without one of us holding him steady and another lifting his legs. LOL Bathing has become a family affair.

We're in the process of purchasing a pulse-ox monitor. Luckily the insurance company is going to pick up a hefty chunk of it. The job of weaning him off the oxygen is going to be ours in tandem with the home-care team.

He's doing really good, considering that his projected stay at the acute care center was going to be 4-5 weeks. He was out of there in 2 1/2.

Big Kid is really glad to be home. Except for one thing. He misses the nurse call clicker thingy. LOL Yeah, for the first few mornings I got up at 3am to make him french toast and cocoa.

Yesterday I bought a bunch of microwavable breakfast foods and easy packets of Swiss Miss for him to fix by himself.

One day soon, hopefully we'll all be able to get on a reasonable sleep schedule.

Until then, click this, Baby. ;-)

Day 45---My Boy's Coming Home

Today at 12pm I got a call from the kid.

"You can come get me. I'm ready to come home."

What? On Saturday they told us it would be a week to 10 days. But yes, the doctor has cleared him to come home.

So we've been racing around all afternoon rearranging stuff and moving Little Guy upstairs to the loft.

Fortunately, the care hospital did all the arranging for the portable oxygen to get him home.

Big Kid is going to still need it 24-hours-a-day. And a walker. For awhile. The home nurse is going to come every couple of days to take labs, and we're setting up the therapy schedule.

Hubby is on his way to the city to get him, and I'm waiting for the oxygen company to bring the large concentrator unit.

My boy, my boy. My precious boy.

Joy unrestrained!

xo

ATM

Ho Ho Ho and All that Good Stuff

Last year after I became ill, I decided that I wanted to take some time to work on some craft projects---Christmas Ornaments---that I'd been dying to do, but never made the time for. As many of you already know (from the fabulous projects I've seen on your pages), having a creative outlet is a great stress buster.

A month or so into it, a friend who is also a family caregiver came by. I showed her my projects, and she asked if she could join me. Her daughter, who has Down Syndrome, thought she might enjoy creating things, and then we were three.

Big Kid was talking in his therapy group (young adults with mental health issues) about our little band, and a couple of his compadres wanted to join. As one said, "Even Goths love Christmas!" Seeing these young men---tatted and pierced---sitting around my dining room table in a sea of ribbons and bows is a vision I'll never forget! ;-)

We hauled a bunch of our creations to a craft fair over the summer, and did very well. And an idea was born.

So I organized and funded a collaborative craft studio to help market the creations of adults who have disabilities and their family caregivers in an effort to help them become more financially independent. If they aren't mobile or prefer to work in their own homes, we pick up and deliver the supplies to them. Every step of the process is a collaborative effort---from ornament design, photography, our new website----and of course the crafting!

Before the doo-doo hit the fan with Big Kid's illness, we had already sold to a few gift shops around the country. Unfortunately, we lost 6 weeks because of our crisis, and I feel awful for our crafters.

But it's not too late! Please visit our website and see if there's a "must have" gift or ornament for your tree! They're wonderful---the pictures really don't do them justice!

Highland Roses Design; A Collaborative Craft Studio

ATM

Day 41

Grrrr! I've been having some internet connection problems in the last couple of days. Sorry!

The kid is doing great. He's been zipping around the unit in his walker in an effort to get stronger. They removed his stomach tube on Tuesday, and he still has some residual pain from that, but he's not letting it keep him down.

Of course, the vicodin they gave him yesterday might have helped a bit. ;-)

A rep from the care hospital approached us and asked us if they could take a picture of Big Kid and do a write-up on him. Apparently the speed of his recovery is quite remarkable especially since "he had had such a slim chance of survival."

Wha??? Yes, we knew he was very very ill and near death, but that's the first we'd heard of the original odds.

So I did what I've been doing way too much of in the past several weeks. I burst into tears. Again. Is there ever going to be a day when that doesn't happen? I think I've cried more in the last 6 weeks than I have in the last 10 years combined.

Big Kid put his arms around me. "It's ok, Mom," he said. "I beat it. I beat it."

Yes he did.

We're hoping that he can come home in a couple of days. We have the home therapy and care in place. Little Guy is going to move into the loft for a few weeks and let Big Kid have his room, since it's on the main level and won't require stairs.

Can't wait.

Thanks so much for sticking with us during this horrible ordeal. Thank you for all your prayers and kind comments. I don't think I would have made it through this without all of the support.

Many Blessings,

ATM

Day 39

gah! I guess I really gave a wrong impression about Kitty with my bout of annoyance with her. My apologies.

As a mom, I struggle with this relationship. But my son is 22 years old, and it's not my decision to make. If I want to keep a close relationship with him, I have to support some of his choices, and be there for him if it doesn't work out. When they started dating, I wrote about her here, if anyone wants a little background.

She never wanted Big Kid's friend to stay at her house. I don't blame her a bit. She works two jobs, and wants some peace and quiet when she gets home. Big Kid talked her into it, because he's fearful and lonely when she isn't around and he doesn't drive. The "friend" had been kicked out of his own home and had been living off the kindness of friends for awhile. He knew a good thing when he saw it.

He ate all their food, didn't clean up after himself, and contributed nothing to the household. He even brought a freaking dog there, because he "always wanted a dog, and his mom wouldn't let him have one". He helped himself to Kitty's things, and started expecting her to haul his happy butt around in her car. She refused, and then there would be these two-against-one episodes. Not a good situation.

About 2 weeks into Big Kid's illness, when it became clear that it could be weeks or months before he could come back, Kitty told the "friend" it was time to move on. He wasn't her child, her sibling, or her significant other, and it wasn't her lot in life to support him. She didn't realize when he cleared out that he took some of Big Kid's stuff with him.

I'm not mad at Kitty because Big Kid's stuff was stolen. Those are only things and things can be replaced. I was just really annoyed at her timing, knowing that a large part of Big Kid's successful recovery will depend on his state of mind. He's my baby, and it's my job to be concerned about these things.

Big Kid doesn't want to go to the rehabilitation center, so the plan is that he's going to come home to our house for awhile. Our family doctor is going to take over his treatment, and his office is now an hour in the opposite direction. I can't and won't drive 6 hours in a day to pick Big Kid up from Kitty's house and get him back to see the doctor, especially if we have to do this a couple of times a week.

Plus, Kitty still has to work two jobs, and it wouldn't be a good idea to leave the kid alone for extended periods. At our house, he'll have somebody available around the clock, plus he'll be getting home health care and in-home therapy (and someone to help make sure he follows through with it). Kitty's more than welcome to come and stay over if she wants.

Yesterday they took out the pic line and removed the bandages from the Kid's throat. Early this morning, they're going to take out the stomach tube. Thank heavens. They had it capped off and just hanging for a few days, and it was causing him pain. I finally asked them to tape it to his body so it wouldn't move around.

He's been working with ankle weights and was able to walk to the therapy room (about 4 doors down) by himself. His legs are gaining strength, but his balance is off. They've been trying to wean him off the oxygen, but he only lasts an hour or so before his saturation level goes under 80. He still can't write. His hands are shaking all of the time.

But all in all, progress!

Thanks so much for your continued kind wishes and support.

xo

Day 38

Big Kid had a fall yesterday when he was trying to get to his chair. He landed on his knees, but they're ok. He figured he had some bad knee karma coming for laughing so hard when I fell on my face. ;-)

As a result, the staff are insisting that he hit the call button before he tries to get up, so someone will be there to watch him fall (as opposed to throwing themselves under him to keep him from cracking his noggin). I'm just kidding.

The only problem with that is that sometimes it takes them 20 minutes to respond, and if he has to go to the bathroom, it might be too late.

Littlebit, thank you so much for the kind words and advice. I'm absolutely going to find out if there are things Big Kid can do other than leg lifts and extentions in bed, and hand weights, etc.

I think I'm a little worried about the wasted time. Big Kid is apathetic by nature, and gives up easily when frustrated. Right now he is calm and motivated to get moving, in a week he may not be. If he loses his motivation, it's going to take the healing process a lot longer. Those of you who've read my blog for a long time will probably get where I'm going with this.

Bi-polar disorder is ugly that way. Meds aren't the perfect fix-it-all, and when Big Kid gets a case of the uglies, it can get really, really ugly.

Last night he called me in tears. "I just want to die," he wept. Turns out his friend, who had been staying at Kitty's house, stole a bunch of his video games and took off. This is not the first time a "friend" has stolen from him, mostly because Big Kid isn't a real good judge of character and chooses dirtbags to hang out with. But the betrayal stung because he tries to have faith in the innate goodness of people.

After I got him calmed down, I called Kitty to find out what in the world possessed her to tell him something like that right now, when she knows how fragile he is emotionally and physically. "Well, he had to find out sometime", was all she said. Yeah, but now? Right now? It happened a couple of weeks ago, not last night. She couldn't wait a couple more weeks to tell him? She hung up on me.

I never raised my voice. I wasn't nasty either. So lovely. Today we get to sort out a 47-year-old-going-on-16-year-old's passive aggressive BS. I've got half a mind to break my bunny-slippered foot up her butt.

Called the night nurse and explained the situation. Asked her if she'd check on him a little more often and try to assess his emotional condition and to call if she thought we should drive down into the city to spend the night with him.

Today, hopefully Big Kid will get the stomach tube out and the pic line. Positive steps! We want him home for Christmas!

xo

Day 36

I'm bone tired. I know I keep saying this, but really I am. I'm sorry I didn't post an update this morning, but my a$$ is dragging all over the place.

I spent the morning yesterday with Big Kid, and came home and fell into bed. I can't stop waking up at 2:30 or 3:00am, like I was doing when he was in the ICU. I try to go back to sleep, but it's hopeless. By 1 in the afternoon, I'm practically comatose.

When I woke up yesterday from my nap, Hubby and the guys had the tree up. It's always been our tradition to put the tree up the day after Thanksgiving, and then set a time over the weekend where we get together (moans from the teenagers and all) to decorate it.

When I woke up today from my nap, the boys had decorated it with all the care they could just to please me. I know they need the normalcy, but this was the first Christmas where I wasn't directing, and the first where Big Kid wasn't there complaining about the whole thing. gah. On one hand, I'm so touched that they took it in hand, on the other, I hate that the Big Kid isn't a part of it.

He's going to hate it too.

I know, I know, I'm being a big freaking crybaby.

I just want our life back, with everybody intact.

The good news is that the Kid is able to make about 4-6 steps on his own. Yesterday the physical therapist and he made two laps back and forth in the hallway with a walker. He said his "lungs were tired" and he had to go back to bed.

Today, when I got there early, he was seated in his chair and very proud that he had gotten there on his own. He was going to refuse a shower, but I talked him into one.

He didn't want to ride the wheelchair to the big therapy shower, so we got an extension on his oxygen hose, got a chair, and I helped scrub him down in the shower that was in the bathroom in his room.

The RT came in to look at his trach wound. He still has a big hole in his throat.

Then we settled down---all clean and shiny---and watched some of the "Dirty Jobs" marathon. ;-)

This afternoon, they took him off oxygen completely. He was really psyched, but he only lasted about 1 1/2 hours before his oxygen level went down to 75. It's just going to take some time.

He's trying hard. What I don't get is that there are no physical or occupational therapists to work with him on the weekends. Seriously, they just expect him to lie in bed and do whatever over the weekends and holidays.

This is advertised as a "care hospital". Healing doesn't take weekends off. Why don't they have people there 7 days a week to do this stuff? Big Kid was restless, so I got permission and went and got hand weights from the "gym".

::sigh::

xoxo

ATM

Day 35

We had a restful and uneventful Thanksgiving. How about you?

Hubby, the guys and I ate turkey dinner early, and then they drove up to Denver for the football game. I brought Big Kid and Kitty dinner with all the fixin's at the care center.

The kid ate about half of his and conked out. ;-)

The stomach tube and pic line are coming out today or tomorrow. Joy!

The goal today (for me) is to get the boy into some underpants. Those gowns are way too short. Hubby has started referring to the kid as Fred Sanford, because he's still flashing all his junk around.

Some random thoughts from the past month:

I don't recommend the "Scared the sh*t outta me diet". I lost 10 pounds the first two weeks the Kid was sick, because everything tasted like ashes when I remembered to eat. Even worse is the "if you were any closer to death, you'd be dead diet". Big Kid has lost 40 pounds. He'd gained about 100 pounds as a side effect to depakote over the past few years, so he definitely had it to lose, but sheesh! What a way to lose it!

I'm never, ever going to be able to watch House, MD. again and give a little snicker when House treats the families of ill loved-ones facing death like chew toys. We had a taste of that. Not that this particular doctor had the malicious or perverse intent of being a total asshat, but his social skills lacked a certain something. So, as Hubby articulated---he wasn't quite a House, but more like a Bungalow. Although he was a brilliant doctor who helped save our boy's life, forever to us, he will be "Bungalow, M.D."

On Day 2 at the ICU, Hubby and I went into the family waiting room to unwind for a little while. I threw myself onto a loveseat, and Hubby sank into an armchair to the left of me. We were the only people in the room. A couple of minutes later the rocking chair to the right of me started rocking by itself. I was already at Defcon 1 on the terror scale, so it barely even registered. A little while later I asked Hubby if he had seen it, or if I was losing my mind. "I didn't want to say anything," he admitted. "You were already coming apart." We still have no idea WHAT in the heck that was.

People are kind. Many are virtual strangers and virtual friends (and virtual strangers who've become virtual friends). Being able to throw out my worst fears to the ether and ask for help and comfort in a world which is in the midst of chaos, and then have people extend to me a heartfelt lifeline is just incredible. You guys are incredible. You've helped keep me sane.

New day, new goals. Thanks for hanging in with us!

xo