I wanted to apologize for disappearing for a couple of days, but I had to go on my scheduled "ride-along" with law enforcement for my Criminal Justice Class.
Let's just say I rode over 200 miles of mountain dirt roads on a daily patrol---most of which were far more pitted and rutted than the ones I was bitching about in our development. My teeth were shaking in my head, and at one point, the road was so bumpy that the radar apparatus flew off the dashboard and landed in my lap.
I spent half the time squinching up my butt cheeks for fear of a fart shaking loose, and the other half grasping the handle on the right side of the door with one hand and accidently grasping the handle of the M-16 strapped in on my left when we climbed the steep mountain curves. Oy!
The highlight was driving along a winding mountain highway and seeing a huge fall of dirt and rocks come down right in front of us.
The deputy said, "Oh, it's that time of year again," as she nonchalantly drove around the mess and called it in for road works.
I'm thinking---"uh yeah, but it's on MY side of the car that all this shit is falling!"
I didn't get a chance all day to blog and remind everyone that new entries for the American Midol Really Bad Poetry Contest were due tonight, so I'm extending it one more day.
I know you're all scared! But jeez, if you lose, it means your poetry was too good to be bad!!