Hubby's sister passed away peacefully last week in hospice. He flew out and just got back today. I stayed behind because I had to travel to my mother's wedding yesterday on Valentine's day and just got back today myself.
Took Little Guy with me.
Since somebody had to take care of the dogs and the house, Big Kid, Kitty and the Aspiring Adult all stayed here together to keep an eye on things and each other. ((sigh)) At least they didn't burn the house down. More on that another time.
We arrived on Sunday, and Mom was a basket case. LOL She's anal retentive on a good day and this just about blew her sockets. She had to go over every detail again and again and my job was to assist her and keep her calm.
I helped her get ready on the big day---and surprise! At 78, my mom had gotten her ears pierced! I had to put her earrings in because she was so nervous her hands were shaking.
It was a lovely service---just Beau, Mom, their kids and grandkids. It was held in the chapel of the church we've gone to since we were children. I was the matron of honor and Beau's son was the best man.
Both of my brothers walked Mom down the aisle---that's when I started bawling. ;-) She looked so beautiful!
Beau lost it during the vows part. He was so emotional and sobbed a bit. Which of course set off his son and daughters. Not a dry eye in the house! When my mom was saying her vows, "I promise to love, honor and cherish" Beau jumped in with, "What happened to obey?" LOL
At the end, after they were pronounced man and wife (and kissed), Beau's son and I helped them down from the dais, one on each side (didn't want anybody to break a hip).
The pastor introduced them with their married name to the congregation, and before anybody could start clapping, Little Guy jumped up from the front row, shouted "Group Hug!!" and almost knocked them down! snarf
Thank you all for all your suggestions! After looking at tons of boobs, I found the perfect peignoir set! Can't tell you how much I appreciate it! ________________________________
We just found out a few days ago that one of Hubby's sisters is dying. She had breast cancer some years ago, and thought she had beat it. In December she had a hernia operation, and they found that she had cancer throughout her body. Apparently the chemo wasn't successful this time and she's going into hospice. We had no idea, as she is a very private person. He's devastated as are we all. :-( With all the snowstorms and cold, as well as personal obligations, we're trying to juggle to get him a flight down to the south.
I haven't written about this or anything else, simply because of number 1) the stress has just exhausted me, and number 2) there might have been legal ramifications if I wrote about it prematurely.
Little Guy and several other students who have disabilities had their rights under the law seriously violated this last semester at school. When it was brought to the administration's attention, the head of disability services shit-canned the offending teacher, but offered one remedy, and one remedy only to make up for it. Take it or leave it.
I decided to leave it, because I didn't feel that it would be beneficial to Little Guy, and I thought she was being pretty freaking high-handed about the whole thing.
So I went over her head.
We had a meeting with her and the superintendent on Friday, armed to the teeth with the case we were planning on presenting in a lawsuit. It didn't come to that, because the superintendent could see the long-term issues and couldn't see why what we asked for (an additional semester of transition services for what our son had lost) wasn't offered by his employee.
There was a positive outcome. Woohoo. I'm still tired, though. LOL
Sorry I haven't written or checked your blogs out lately, but things have been hairy around the Attila House. I've just had too much damn anxiety to write anything. Will share soon.
But I have some funny/good/precious news. And I need your help.
I've talked a lot about my mom in my blog over the years, and my struggles with our relationship especially when I searched and found my birth family (I'm adopted). I even shared the sorrow when my step-dad passed away a few years ago.
I've shared her struggles as a newly single gal, how she dumped a bunch of old guys because they just wanted to get married and have someone take care of them.
She was done "taking care of sick old men". And she had a checklist for the men she was going to date:
1) He had to be able to drive 2) He didn't want to get married (she was married 24 years to my dad and 24 years to my step-dad and was done with being married) 3) He had to be in reasonably good health
Also told you guys about this older beau she's had for a couple of years. She's 78, he's just turned 88. For the first time, she's the trophy hoochie. LOL
Anyhoo, he's a gem. A real sweetie. They're both really active and go to plays, concerts, senior events and seminars. He's taken her to Vermont to see the leaves change, to New Mexico for the Hot Air Balloon Festival. When my son was in the ICU, he drove her down (2-hour drive) frequently to sit vigil with me.
The year before last at Easter, I wrote about how the families got together for a meal and to meet each other for the first time. His adult children, her adult children (except for me) went out to a restaurant. They sat at opposite sides of the table, like a mafia sit down.
Both sets of "kids" were wary---worried that their elderly parents might be taken advantage of.
Beau's son somewhat superciliously asked my mom to tell him about herself.
She said, "well I've married and buried quite a few men in my time". He was agape. She and beau laughed their asses off.
Then she added, "didn't you have a minister at your wedding?" Snarf. She's a retired United Methodist Minister. I wish I had been there!
Anyhoo, a few days ago, she called me and told me that she and Beau have decided to tie the knot. They'd just been to a lawyer and signed a prenup keeping all their stuff separate. For the last year or so, they'd been going between his house, which is full of crap, and her house, which is full of crap.
They were just worried about what the neighbor's were thinking. On one hand, they could live in sin, but my mom was worried that if something happened to Beau, his kids (who don't actually live close) might not be available if decisions about their dad needed to be made.
Ok, that's her story and she's sticking to it.
So I asked her when the big day was and she said Valentine's Day.
I was stunned. "Why so soon?" I asked.
"We aren't getting any younger. How long should we wait?"
Ok, so here's the deal. We had a talk tonite and I asked her what I could do to help. She's running around like a chicken with her head cut off.
Since she isn't having a bridal shower, and she won't let me arrange the bouquet or contribute, I decided that I wanted to buy her a romantic peignoir set or something for her honeymoon. I've seen her jammies. LOL
I can't find anything that isn't crotchless, nippleless, too short, too staid, vinyl, etc etc etc, even when I look at "bridal" stuff. Or boyish stuff. Or hiphugging stuff.
I'm looking for something in blue, aqua, medium pink---pastelly but not white. I mean she's 78, fer pete's sakes. Something somewhat froofy. You know, romantic. It can be mid-length or long.
She wears an XL, and price is not a problem. I'd rather something a little more highend than Kmart polyester, if you know what I mean.