Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Got a Hot Date...
I'm off for a couple of days.
Lest anyone thinks that my name "Attila the Mom" is synonymous with "Attila the old fart Mom", let me inform you:
I'm driving the big kid up to the big city to go to see the Unholy Alliance Tour and the band Slayer.
Except that I'm not actually going. But it's the thought that counts, isn't it?
My brothers and I have had a running deal for about 4 years now.
I'll buy the tickets if either or both of them are willing to have their hearing destroyed and accompany my son.
That way they can relive their misspent youths, and I can be sure that the kid has a somewhat sensible companion in the mosh pit who also happens to be a safe driver.
Over the years they've all gone to Ozfest, Ear-splitting Crap Masquerading as Music Fest, Addled Old Rockers with Man Boobs and Saggy Upper Arms Fest (wait a minute--I think I have that confused with Ozfest--my bad), My Face Has 48-piercings and 37 Tattoos but My Mother Still Thinks I'm Cute Fest and We're Really Devil Worshippers Who Eat Babies in our Dressing Room Fest.
A couple of years ago, a concert-goer got so excited over the FESTivities that he pulled down his pants and pissed all over my older brother's back.
You get the idea. The kid likes thrash. And bless my brothers.
In the meantime, I'll be alone in a fabulous downtown Denver hotel, with room service and central air conditioning. I'm going to be able to take a long, hot bubble bath with no one knocking on the door asking, "Honey, have you seen my keys?" (check in the last pair of pants you wore), or "Moooooom! This pair of socks don't match!" (Look in your drawer. I'm sure you'll find an identical pair in there).
I have a hot date with a detective named Lucas Davenport and unlimited Snapple on ice.
I know I've neglected all of your blogs, and I deeply apologize. These last couple of weeks have been insanely busy for me. When I get back I'll finish the "Crash Course" and give you guys some undivided attention.