Friday, April 11, 2008

Busy as a Bee.....

I know I've been a neglectful blogger. I seem to be apologizing all over the place all the time. So I'll give a quick rundown.

Big Guy and I are finishing our last month of the semester. Lots of projects to finish, term papers to do, finals to study for. Little Guy is graduating from high school, got an 18th birthday party to plan, prom is next week, he's in the school musical so rehearsals to run back and forth for. Big Guy is signed up for vocational rehab, and finishing his rehabilitative driving lessons. We've tried to make all these appointments, but all the snow this week has put us behind.

Since Little Guy is reaching his age of majority, we've been running around getting services in place for him---SSI appointments, community board services, and yes, we've filed for guardianship, despite advice from some self-advocates against it. It certainly doesn't have to be permanent, but he's very vulnerable to people who might take advantage of him. I'm not going to argue about it with the self-advocates, because I understand where they're coming from. But they function enough to blog about their views. He doesn't.

We've got a "friend of the court" visit next week to check out our home for suitability and to interview him to see what his wishes are. I'm so nervous that I'm teaching the dogs how to curtsy.

On the plus side, I wrote about some personal woes a couple of weeks ago in The Suckage of Life, and want to say that the majority of this has been resolved---maybe not to everybody's personal satisfaction, but we all walked away from it feeling equally screwed---so the family love and affection is still intact. Big huge weight off my shoulders.

More later....

Have a great weekend!

ATM

13 comments:

carmachu said...

They court visit should go fine. Just show them your slppers and tell them what happened last time when someone tries to take avantage of mommy's baby and they should have no problem.....:D

Trish said...

Whew! A lot going on for you - good luck.

Yes, Bunny Slippers of Doom should be prominently placed during that court visit. . .LOL

litzi said...

Hi Attila,
It appears that you’re still burning the candle at both ends! I hope the taper is long enough to last through all you’re aiming to accomplish in the near future. Try taking some deep breaths every so often; it helps enormously…

TOM said...

Hpope you have a nice weekend too!

Angela said...

busy busy

Try to get a breath in sometime

Cheri said...

Have a great weekend (well, Sunday).

Heather said...

I've been thinking of you.
xo ♥

Beth said...

Aren't you wondering if your life will ever calm down?
Best of luck with the guardianship matter.

Melissa said...

Good luck. You have a lot on your plate, but you are doing good things for so many people--I root for you!

Stinkypaw said...

Hope things will fall into place real soon, for all of you & thru it all, don't forget to breath! Best of luck, but I don't think you're leaving much room for luck, being so well prepared. You go girl! :-)

abfh said...

I'd like to point out that being able to blog about one's views is not evidence of whether or not a person is vulnerable. There are self-advocates who blog very well and who are also very vulnerable. Some are voluntarily under guardianship because they don't understand how to handle money or because they have other issues, while others rely informally on friends or family to help them out. And of course, there are some people who can't blog worth a nickel, but who have a good sense of how to manage practical things. These are two completely separate issues.

Attila The Mom said...

Very true. :-) What I meant (without getting into a big debate about it) is that he isn't able to come here and write about how he's feeling about it or what it means to him. He has however spent time discussing this with his doctor, a therapist, his transitions team, an impartial advocate and an impartial court representative. I just didn't want to get into the nitty gritty here and maybe used a poor choice of words. :-)

abfh said...

Thanks for clarifying. I'd say that you are going about this the right way, having several people discuss the matter with your son and determine what he would prefer, as well as recognizing that guardianship need not always be permanent.

When we got into that "debate" last year, my main point was that parents shouldn't automatically assume that their autistic teenagers will have to be under guardianship their entire lives, simply because they are naive and vulnerable as teenagers. I was not arguing that guardianship should never be an option under any circumstances.

I was raised by parents who are rather old-fashioned in some ways and believe in putting the fledglings out of the nest without delay. While I'm stronger for it now, I did get into some less than ideal situations as a result of being vulnerable. All parents have to make decisions about how much to protect their kids from the world, and people have different philosophies on how to go about it, based on their own experiences and their observation of how their kids are developing.