Friday, July 20, 2007

Stop Buggin' Me!

Summer is time for fun in the sun and fresh veggies from the garden, but it's prime time for creepy crawly things too.

And you know how I feel about those.

On the ick scale, Lady Bugs and Roly-Polys rank as damn near benign and almost cute. Butterflies and moths are ok, as long as there aren't a zillion of them, such as during the Miller Moth invasion that swept the west almost 20 years ago.

Everything else scares the dickens out of me.

A few weeks ago I stumbled into the kitchen early in the morning to make coffee. The first thing I do is turn on the water to let it run for a minute or two to blow the pipes out. Don't ask me why, but our water comes from a reservoir, and that's what we've been instructed to do.

Anyway, I dumped the old coffee grounds in the trash and brought the coffee-ground-holder-thingy to the sink to rinse out.

There was a HUGE, I mean HUGE black spider in the sink. That monstrosity was at least 2 inches across.

AAAAAIIIGHHHHHHHHH!!

I ran like hell down the hall, screaming my head off, and dragged hubby out of bed.

Maybe I even peed a little.

Then I hid in the bathroom quivering, until he disposed of it.

A couple of seconds later, there was a tap-tap-tap at the door.

"Did you get it?" I whimpered.

All clear.

I opened the door and recoiled in horror. He was holding it by the leg.

Is this it?

It wasn't a spider. It was the top of a vine-ripened tomato that I'd served with dinner the night before.

That said, when I read in the news about the Colorado man who had five bumps on his scalp that were MOVING and turned out to be hairy
fly larvae, I've been checking every single bump or itchy spot on my body.

Over and over again.

Even though I've never been to Belize.

And I'm never going there. No way. No how.

Aiiggghhhhh!!!

19 comments:

Brenda said...

I'm almost as bad about the spiders. I want a good distance between myself and them during any and all encounters.

I read that in one of my news feeds about the Botfly larva in that man's head and spent the day all itchy and scratchy. In his interview on the news he mentioned that hearing the "ticking" noises were the worst part of the ordeal.Wayyyy freaky.

Blogarita said...

Most bugs don't bother me much, as long as they aren't on me. But I have to say a bump on my body that was moving would freak me out.

Ashley's Mom said...

You and I must have been separated at birth. I HATE all bugs also, and the only reason I had male children was so they could kill the bugs for me.

Beth said...

Of all the fears I have in life (and I have some pretty crazy ones) insects are not on the list. Despite my so-called "sweet" nature, I can crush those critters in a heartbeat. (Although I do give them a chance to leave the premises first - if possible.)

Anonymous said...

OMFG we just destroyed a wasp's nest (turned out there were two of them!!) in an old bbq on our back deck. I got stung by one of the damm things, and now everytime I see something flying around I scream like a schoolgirl and run into the house flailing my arms.

Fiery said...

I remember the moth invasion of 20 years ago. It was hideous. They were EVERYWHERE!!!!! We had crank out windows and they were forever getting trapped in the mechanism. *gag*

Dad had a bugzapper light and it would get clogged nightly with their zapped bodies.

And if you swatted them they'd go poof and leave behind a disgustingly dusty icky mess.

I didn't know anyone else remembered it or even labeled that particular few years. yeck!

Litzi said...

Hi Attila,
LMAO about the top of the vine-ripened tomato stem lurking in your kitchen sink. I’m 100% with you about loathing spiders; I’m sure they were put on earth for some particular purpose other than to scare the crap out of people, but it’d certainly be nice if they stayed outdoors and away from the potted plants.

All my California Oak Trees are infested with some variety of annoying moths this summer; every evening the air is thick with the little buggers, which makes being outside most unpleasant. I inquired about having the trees sprayed but was told that unless everyone in the vicinity does likewise, it’d be a waste of time and money. Hopefully they’ll disappear soon…

How are Little Guy’s hands?

Manda said...

LOL, I have done the same thing, running from something because I thought it was a spider. I don't even want to be in the same house as a spider.
Down here in the deep south the worst bugs to me are the giant mosquitos, they love my ankles and feet. Oh yeah, and yellow jackets, those suckers hurt!

carmachu said...

Awww, you are so cute when you get all freaked out....

Angela said...

This post made me itchy

Anonymous said...

Bwaaaahahahahahaha... I am sorry but thát was really funny!

seahorse said...

Ugh, bugs...at least all the floods in the UK are keeping them at bay. You've been tagged for a random meme:

http://beautyoffensive.blogspot.com/2007/07/random-facts.html

stinkypaw said...

ok you did it this time - I have goose bumps all over... argh!

Special K said...

You seriously have to quit it with the posts including stories of people getting infested with bugs.

Anonymous said...

That was too funny, but I can totally understand. We get a lot of creepy crawlers out here in the country and I always think I see something moving, and I take my position to squash it. I hate them and sometimes have dreams where one is falling down from the ceiling on me. I jump out of bed and everything, how weird is that? YUCK,YUCK,YUCK!! Glad you hubby came to your rescue. XOXO

Jennifer McKenzie said...

LOL. This happens to you a lot. Does that mean something?
I don't LIKE spiders, but I smash 'em. I don't run from them. I'm the official spider killer in my house.
My husband tends to back away from them slowly. His redneck ego won't let him run to the bedroom.
He steps away and sweats a lot.

Michelle Flaherty said...

I'm SO with you on the bug thing. I can deal with butterflies because they're beautiful and lady bugs 'cause they supposedly mean good luck but the rest just need to be smooshed. Spiders, uh uh, no way!! Kill those bastards!!

Scully's Moulder said...

I'm ok about spiders as long as they're not touching me. hehe Ever seen a Camel Spider before?!

phlegmfatale said...

That is the FUNNIEST thing - tomato stem. Scary stuff!

Ew, that fly larvae thing-- I could have had a happy life without ever hearing that. EEp!