Tuesday, September 12, 2006

Is the Grass Always Greener?



A couple of weeks ago I wrote a post called No Good Deed about my oldest son and a couple of his friends. I was bemoaning the fact that none of them seemed to have a lick of sense, and compared the knuckleheads to The Three Stooges.

After reading an article yesterday, I'm happy to report that I'm not quite so worried about them any more.

I've been imagining this scene over and over in my mind. This is how it's played out for me:

Enter The Three Stooges on acid. With Beavis and Butthead voices.

Hey, look at the picture of this chick in the newspaper!

Wow. She's hot!

Yeah, dude. She's really hot!

I'd do her!

Yeah, well I'd do her too!

Not if I did her first!!

Why don't we all do her?

Kewl, man! Let's all do her!!

Who's got the shovel?

Stop the music. Cue screeching car crash sound.

A shovel?

Yep. A shovel.

In Wisconsin, twin brothers Alexander and Nicholas Grunke, and Dustin Radke, all 20, were arrested in the act of digging up a corpse to have sex with.

Nicholas Grunke read an obituary complete with picture of a young woman who had tragically died in an accident a couple of weeks earlier.

He decided she was "the one", and enlisted the other two bird brains to help him.


Luckily they hadn't yet opened the crypt when they were apprehended.

Boggles the mind, doesn't it?

I'm off to hug my Big Kid now.

...And to thank my lucky stars.

28 comments:

Ma Titwonky said...

There are some things around which I simply cannot wrap my mind. Digging up a corpse for sex is one of them. All I can really say about this one is thank God and every Saint within hearing distance that none of those people (including the corpse) is/was my child.

Pendullum said...

Aghhhhh....
I can not believe it....
I think I would need intensive therapy if those were my kids...

Samantha said...

I already heard this story and it still makes me sick. I wonder what the family are like, and how they reacted to hearing their children were caught about to have sex with a corpse.

They even bought condoms before hand. Disgusting.

carmachu said...

*blinks*

Uhm hello, car accident? Who says she looks like that in the last place?

Thats not even going into the icky part of hello, she's a corpse your digging up from the ground........

Reminds me of the song with the refrain "and the world is full of stupid people...."

Of course Attila, you did check his closet for a shovel right? Just to make sure he's not THAT dumb.......*grin*

KL said...

OMG they even bought condoms??? Were they afraid that they might get her pregnant? I know...but if they were stupid enough to dig her up...anything is possible!!

Scully said...

Shudder...I'm starting to think my 14 year old might just be a saint...at least in comparison

Miss Keeks said...

AAARRRRGGGGHHHHH!!!!
Never having kids... never having kids...
Gross.

RC said...

ugh...that's disgusting.

Kate said...

"Boggles the mind, doesn't it?"

You aren't kidding. My mind is well and truly boggled.

Mind you, on the bright side, I too now realise that my children are 100% normal.

Mr. Fabulous said...

I can see if she was still on the table in the funeral home, but once they are in the ground, you gotta draw the line there, you know?

St Jude said...

Yes I am still here!! This reminds me of a case I was overseeing recently. Unfortunately they did manage to dig up the corpse and the rest I shall leave to your imagination. It was however very difficult to prosecute as there is actually no law that covers the extent of this 'crime' in the UK. They are now locked safely away in a high security psychiatric unit.

By the way they didn't bother with the condoms... that's how they were caught. Maybe your boys are not so daft!!!

imfunnytoo said...

Well damm. Those enterprising little grave diggers...eewwww.

Kim Ayres said...

Sometimes you read something and you suddenly realise it's too late - the damage is done and you can't unread it. This images are formed in the mind's eye and the stomach is wanting to escape.

Ew!

Stinkypaw said...

Boggles isn't strong enough to describe the state of my mind at the moment!

Again, proof that the gene pool is in some serious need of chlorine!!!

Mia said...

NASTY!!!! Nasty nasty nasty.

I guess I'm going to get a break from the scary clown nightmares for a few nights to be replaced by this double mint twin freak show!

Gak.

Me said...

OH god!!!
Uuuugggggh

shirley said...

Hahahahahaaa!! Omigosh, if they ever brought Beavis & Butthead back, you could write their first episode. How do you find all these crazy news stories?

shirley said...

Oh, and I'm totally excited that you found the limit to Mr. Fab's perversions!

Annie Drogynous said...

I think I've lost my appetite. Permanently. I would smack my kids this way to Sunday if they tried doing that sort of crazy crap. There's really only one word for this...EW.

DutchBitch said...

Aaaarrgghhhh!!!!! Thank you for that graphic scene...

Jod{i} said...

ewwwwwwwwwww....
and yes, I need to give my kid a BIG hug!

Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly said...

jaw still hanging open...

hand in there, you!

Lisa

Lisa Goldstein/Kelly Kelly said...

oh man, i meant to say hang in there you. now I grossed myself out. ugh. sorry.

Lisa

Rhonda said...

Ah, thanks for the perspective. I think I'll hug my teenson, too.

Ruth Dynamite said...

...and this is why China is going to take over the world.

Kevin Charnas said...

I think that I'm going to be sick.

Annie Drogynous said...

I just heard the news that the judge dismissed the case! That even though they had dug through to her crypt, there was no necrophilia law in Wisconsin!

Pardon me?!

Apricoco said...

Eeww, ew, ew! This is beyond gross. What the hell is wrong with people these days? I mean if you really need some that bad hire a hooker and save yourself the backache!