Please Send Good Wishes...

Not about dogs 'n' skunks...that's all good.

I used to write about my nephew the "Happening Dude" from time to time (you can click on the label if you want to refresh your memory--he's the kid who will taste anything for money). I haven't for the past year because it's been a little painful for our family, and I really don't want to give his mom the public butt-kicking I think she deserves.

There is just some laundry that can't be aired, so I'll sketch it as briefly as possible.

About 4 years ago, my brother's ex-wife and her new husband had a baby. HD had been adopted from foster care by my brother and his ex shortly before their divorce and she had primary custody. They live in another state.

Anyway, HD was born with Fetal Alcohol Syndrome, had some very mild learning disabilities and some growth issues. He's very very small for his age, much to his embarassment. He needs a lot of one-on-one attention.

After the new baby, ex decided to start a home business. She decided that HD was a little too much to handle with her new busy life and she really needed his room for a home office. So she called my brother (who was living in my mother's house with my mom and step-dad who is now deceased) and gave him an ultimatum.

Either come and get HD, or she was going to have him placed in a foster group home. I sh*t you not.

So that's how HD came here.

My brother has a lot of good intentions, but is not the most responsible of people. So most of HD's care fell to my mom. To give her a break, HD would come and stay with us for holidays, vacations, and some weekends. We loved having him, and having the chance to get to know him, because due to the acrimonious nature of the divorce, brother's ex never let the kids come visit us.

HD was doing really well in school, and made a lot of friends.

Last summer, the poop hit the fan. While he was visiting us, ex called HD here and told him she wanted him back. Turns out that her new husband had filed for a divorce, my brother's obligation of child support for the older kids had run out a couple of months earlier, and her home business was a disaster. She'd decided to move kit and caboodle back to her home state, and while her soon-to-be-ex would share equal custody with their baby, he didn't intend on financing her new life in perpetuity.

Legally, there was really nothing any of us could do. She still retained primary custody, although HD had been out here almost 3 years. And he WANTED to go. She promised that she would make time for just the two of them, and promised that he could come visit us last summer (none of which she followed through with). She's his mom, and he loves her.

We decided not to fight it, simply because it would have put HD in the hurtful position of being in the middle.

He called us a couple of times in the last year, but hung up whenever she came into the room, so our contact with him has been limited.

We heard Monday night that he's missing. Of course, ex didn't bother to let my brother know---one of his older kids called that night.

The authorities think that he might be trying to make it here. We haven't heard anything from him, and it's been over 48 hours since he was "officially" declared missing. He took money his mom had stashed away, so he could be on a bus. Then again, they're taking apart the family computer to see if he hooked up with someone on the internet.

We're just paralyzed.

Please send good thoughts...