Tuesday, September 16, 2008

We Survived the Black Hole...

After 3 days of hard work, Little Guy and I are back in one piece!

Recovered from the Bat Cave:

8 lawn and leaf-sized bags full of garbage
5 tubs fully loaded with sundry crap
6 assorted boxes filled with the same
Hubby's Dress Belt
1 package new and unopened socks buried under stuff
2 packages new and unopened underwear buried under stuff
Miscellaneous tools that have inexplicably gone missing in the last 2 years
3 pairs of my good scissors
1 jar of mystery liquid that looks like pee. No I'm NOT going to open it and smell it.
About 4 days worth of meds scattered on the floor under the mess----some of which haven't been prescribed for at least a year.
2 broken fans
6 petrified dog turds in assorted dog-butt sizes
6 empty Slimfast cans, used as ashtrays
4 forks from our good flatware set
1 Henckels knife
3 spoons from our good set, cemented into 3 empty Haagen Daz cartons.
3 Haagen Daz carton lids, used as ashtrays
2 empty Febreeze spray bottles
3 glasses
2 coffee cups
Pieces from another coffee cup
1 lonely Nike shoe without a match
1 pair of Converse shoes still with the tags on from Xmas last year (the ones he just HAD to have!)
27 burn marks on the log walls and window sills, where the kid put out his cigarettes before throwing dozens of butts on the floor behind his bed

The good news?

No dead bodies
No meese nests


All that's left is to shampoo the carpets and paint the one non-log wall. Oh. And hang new curtains. Then my brand-new office/sewing room/craft space will be complete.

And if the kid ever wants to spend the night again?

He can sleep in the garage. P. I. G. Pig.

I need a nap.



Brenda said...

Oh how I wanted to have hope that Zach's sloppy living tendencies would end as he got older. This news dashes all hope.

Anonymous said...

Sounds way too familiar! Better get that craft room ready but FAST.....don't but in a hide-a-bed. They have a way of creeping back!

Congrats to you. I know it wasn't easy.


QueenofPlanetHotflash said...

Bless Your Heart, at least there weren't any critters

Half rabbit said...

How did all this stuff fit in the room? And how could someone not see dog poo on the floor? I may be a bit messey, and a year younger than big kid. But my floor is relatively clean and free of stuff and I would definitely see (or smell) dog poo.

KL said...

I definitely think you and LG deserve a special treat after all that work! Make hubby take you both out somewhere special as a treat!!!

And next time I come out, we will have to do something big to celebrate too :)

Traceytreasure said...

Wow! I need a nap too!!

Will you share your scissors with me? I used to have lots....Now I don't have any.

I need a craft room too. Any chance you'll share that too?

Didn't think so!

Congrats on your new room!! Paint it pink!!! LOL!!


Chris H said...

IKKK triple IKKKKK... friggin kids! When I cleaned out one of our son's rooms I found used condoms even.... I nearly threw up! Hope you get the room looking beautiful.

Ashley's Mom said...

Did you wear your hazmat suits while cleaning the room? :)

Kim Ayres said...

And I thought this was going to be a post about the LHC in Switzerland :)

mrsb said...

I now have an intense urge to go clean my kids rooms. I haven't seen my scissors in weeks.

just bob said...

Can I have the Converse shoes and unopened socks?

Clippy Mat said...

that's all.
and, God bless ya for that.

Joe said...

Wow, and I thought my family had pack rat itis. When I moved out of my ex's house we rented a big dumpster to get rid of all the stuff. And I still didn't throw out enough.

carmachu said...

8 bags of garbage? ouch....

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

DisGUSting. Ew. Yes, gut that room and enjoy it all for yourself. You more than earned it!

She said...

Sounds like my mom's whole house! I dread cleaning it all up when she dies!

Bless you!

Enjoy your new creative space!

You deserve it!

Grim Reality Girl said...

Wow, now I really need to get the hazmat suit and help Wonder Girl excavate her room. You have made me grateful that she doesn't smoke... I fear food and other discoveries.... Good for you on getting through it and CONGRATS on your new room!!!

Anonymous said...

oh my goodness.

YAY for a new room though!

Stinkypaw said...

I can't believe how bad it was... I can only imagine how his new place will be in the near future... I hope Kitty is ready to clean up some mess...

Have fun in YOUR new room!

Purple Pigeon said...

now i know where all my missing stuff has gone....in the vortex of my older brothers room....

Sounds like an epic task.... lay claim to your shiny new room before it fills up with stuff!

abfh said...

LOL. My son went away to college last month and I still haven't dared a peek into the huge stack of shoeboxes, binders, etc., in his room to investigate what he's been hoarding in there.

I feel quite virtuous enough for cleaning off his bathroom countertop and throwing away all the empty Kleenex boxes, old toothbrushes, empty bottles of liquid soap, and so forth.

No doubt he got the hoarding gene from his father, who never has grasped the concept of buying new underwear and socks.